Fumbling Toward Insolvency (Part 4)

The finances are taking a toll on the relationship.

There are things we (or is that I?) want to do and right now we can't do them. We can't even go out to eat without it being painful. Every dollar spent on 'entertainment' is one less dollar toward our goal. 

Beyond paying off debt, which is the most essential goal as it is the most detrimental, there are desires we have, places we'd like to go, things we'd like to see and even people we'd like to be able to help.

A January court date will cost $3K just for the lawyer road trip alone, not to mention the hours and hours of work involved in gathering up documentation and researching for the appearance, as well as all the work involved on our end should it go forward. Quite daunting and the local work being done is not panning out and our patience, and time, is rapidly running out.

And no one really seems to give a rip.

No one calls us back for the trenchwork, sewer replacement work, quotes are not what we were led to believe they were, insurance doesn't cover any of the work that needs done, need new tires before winter, can't afford an oil change and the pressure is mounting daily.

Fumbling toward insolvency is more like waiting for it all to collapse.

I'm tired.

Perhaps I should stop with the false sense of God 'doing' something for us and just flow with the Dao and let it all go.

Fumbling Toward Insolvency (Part 3)

The estimates are in:

$14,000 to excavate and replace the broken main drain and run a liner

$8,000 for downspouts around the house

$4,000 to replace the front porch 

$4,000 to add to the back porch to prevent water running to the house 

$20,000 to support basement walls and install drainage

On the wish list:

$10,000 to replace bathroom

The kicker:

House is worth $70K if we are lucky. We owe half that on the mortgage.

Insurance covers none of this.

Buy your house for cash companies don't even want the house.

The Dao De Jing has lately been ringing in my ear:

Lay plans for the accomplishment of the difficult before it becomes difficult; Make something big by starting with it when small. Difficult things in the world must needs have their beginnings in the easy; Big things must needs have their beginnings in the small. - Chapter 63, D.C. Lau translation

Often, from a theist perspective, we are called to pray through the difficult but sometimes we miss the common sense and it is here where I find the Dao finds resonance. Perhaps there is something in Proverbs or Ecclesiastes to align with this but I struggle here when these problems of our own doings and our own choices.

I post all of the above not for doom and gloom but to look at it and face it, in print, not completely without hope, but wondering how we got here.

I won't bore you with other details such as immigration and other debts that were accumulated in fashions worthy of a 'how not to' book but I'm reminded of a Talking Heads song and there is something comforting in the absurdity of it all:

Letting the days go by, let the water hold me down

Letting the days go by, water flowing underground

Into the blue again, after the money's gone

Once in a lifetime, water flowing underground

Fumbling Toward Insolvency, Continued

Talked with a financing company yesterday about a 203k option. I know nothing about this but the goal is to roll my mortgage payment into the entire repair bill for one loan with one monthly lump sum payment extended out as far as possible with the lowest interest rate possible.

Considering that my mortgage currently sits at 4% for the remainder of a 15 year loan I'm not sure this is advantageous, especially if the loan rate is upwards of 10%. It would all depend on the length of the loan and the total amount that will get paid over time.

This stuff gets complicated quickly.

Or do we use the equity line of credit sitting at a $0 balance currently just to get things underway with the eventual balance transfer to a 0% option (which is what we did roughly a year ago).

Can't tell you how many 0% balance transfers we've done over the years. While the 3 to 5% charge hurts it is far less painful than the monthly interest charges we'd otherwise incur.

Do we do the 0% same as cash for 18 months option in hopes that we can do a balance transfer (assuming enough of a credit line) before it expires and the interest is tacked on if not paid off?

And in the midst of this what will the immigration issue cost?

For that moment of gratefulness in the midst? We have not had to face this:

http://www.wfmj.com/clip/14833673/boardman-canfield-clean-up-after-flooding

There is no gloating in this. During a heavy rain, the street in front of our house will flood. I've literally woken up in the morning to find cars stalled out in it.

I feel their pain and feel the weight of the concern every time it rains.

The journey continues...

Fumbling Toward Insolvency

The journey into financial insolvency continues. I say this not out of desperation but out of facing the reality before us.

First, the good news.

I am currently employed and at the moment we are sustaining with our current debt load, making progress albeit slowly. We still have a home and two working vehicles and overall our health and mental state is good. We have food on our table and a solid support system of family and friends. 

As for the essentials, we are blessed and in this we remain grateful.

So why put my business out here? Several reasons. Therapy is one. Why to the public at large (even if never read)? There is something 'honest' about just putting it out there. As a hardcore INTJ whose business has always been private there is something intoxicating about this. Is this when INTJs flip out because their plans went completely off the rails and that foundational level of planning and comfort is shot? 

Maybe someone will relate and even find help in the shared journey or, assuming we make our way out of it, hope in the same.

Maybe, just maybe, others out there have been in similar situations and can provide help, advice or even some guidance. 

Part of it is to simply trace the journey to wherever it may lead.

An $8,000 credit card charge that arose shockingly with about 15 minutes to decide whether or not to pay it threw off the entire plan to have all credit card debts paid off by the end of 2019.

Add to that another financial issue which added another $5,000 and a reduction in income of roughly $400 per month toward the current credit card debt has pushed our plan out toward the end of 2021.

On the horizon is a new car purchase and the fact that our income taxes have been adjusted so that hopefully we will break even rather than force the budgeting for a $2-3K return every year.

The immigration debacle still looms large and unknown. Over the past four years this has cost us our tax returns and accumulated savings which is upwards of $10K and it is not done. Even if all goes well this round, there is another round to go.

Throw in twin grandbabies, unplanned and unexpected but the most amazing thing to have happened to us in the past five years, and another on the way and the unknown hovers before us.

Now for the reality:

Our basement foundation is slowly giving way and with the wettest 12 months on record the situation is rapidly becoming dire.

Our front porch is crumbling rapidly and a sinkhole is growing in front of it which will speed up the demise. Our side porch is also starting to move and we are seeing cracks in door frames, doors are sticking or closing when they have not done so before and we are even seeing cracks in ceilings around our home.

Our fear is that it will suddenly happen and collapse.

We do have a sump pump and a french drain in whatever state it's in so at this point we are not seeing water in our basement other than trickling through the cement block and the glass black windows.

But the walls are showing cracks and it is only a matter of time before something really goes wrong.

Without going too much into details we have debt that is more than our house is worth and though we owe less than the house is appraised for (not counting the repairs needed) taking on a large scale loan is a frightening thing.

We're looking at roughly the following:

$20,000 to get draining and wall repair in the basement
$10,000 to repair the front porch and surrounding ground
$20,000 to repair the side of the house (excavation, ground leveling and drainage)
$10,000 to repair the side porch and surrounding ground
$3,000 front door
$1,5000 fire place
$10,000 to replace the bathroom

Almost $80,000 to fix up the house.

The house is worth less than that and is currently unsaleable in its condition.

Do we wait for it to collapse? What then? Pay for the existing mortgage, removal of the collapsed house and build new? Think it's expensive now?

We'll pay on this stuff until we're dead or end up belly up and living who knows where on Social Security, broke and houseless.

Though we aren't there yet those are the fears that linger until a decision is made.

If you are praying folks, please pray.